Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
Church boner. Awkwardddd
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
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