all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
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