laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize