How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Swine flu is the new snow day.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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