How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
zippers are such a cool invention
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I would fuck him just for his dog
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