I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
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