What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Dear god my vagina.
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