I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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