so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
She just used a chaser for red wine.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
false alarm, still single
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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