I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
