just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize