so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
id be glad to
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
I have aggressive nipples.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
Randomize