It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Randomize
