Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
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