I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
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