Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.

  (810): View more from Michigan

  I think you know the answer.

  (248): View more from Michigan

  How can I marinade myself in Vodka?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks. (810): I think you know the answer. (248): How can I marinade myself in Vodka? http://tfl.nu/cvlx
  Replies (12) Good night (3767) Bad night (611)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar http://tfl.nu/zrm3
  Replies (16) Good night (768) Bad night (4018) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (352): View more from Florida

  im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (352): im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition http://tfl.nu/5ifl
  Replies (18) Good night (849) Bad night (5076) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (650): View more from California

  This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (650): This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case" http://tfl.nu/fgo6
  Replies (12) Good night (6414) Bad night (735) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (778): View more from British Columbia

  I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (778): I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter. http://tfl.nu/71jn
  Replies (7) Good night (5121) Bad night (984) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (813): God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket. http://tfl.nu/pclq
  Replies (13) Good night (5759) Bad night (941) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (603): Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college. http://tfl.nu/nve2
  Replies (13) Good night (5760) Bad night (895) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (618): View more from Illinois

  Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (618): Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil. http://tfl.nu/vn3b
  Replies (3) Good night (1416) Bad night (1825) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (313): I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING http://tfl.nu/0fad
  Replies (5) Good night (769) Bad night (2626) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (505): I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster. http://tfl.nu/elih
  Replies (1) Good night (2034) Bad night (595) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (281): View more from Texas

  She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (281): She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out http://tfl.nu/guh4
  Replies (33) Good night (10954) Bad night (991) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (757): View more from Virginia

  shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (757): shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas http://tfl.nu/w87e
  Replies (10) Good night (1544) Bad night (2988) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (773): Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:) http://tfl.nu/gxuq
  Replies (2) Good night (1261) Bad night (331) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (312): View more from Illinois

  It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (312): It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over. http://tfl.nu/eihc
  Replies (3) Good night (738) Bad night (233) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business. http://tfl.nu/a4r2
  Replies (5) Good night (1958) Bad night (270) Order T-Shirt

Randomize