The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
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