Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
