btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
