i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
