2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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