Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
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