That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
Randomize
