i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
