found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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