i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Randomize
