Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
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Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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