Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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