PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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