I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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