I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
