Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
