I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
