it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
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