It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Randomize