i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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