He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
Randomize
