Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
