WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Sorry about my life...
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
