So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
Randomize