Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
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