i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
Randomize