I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize