So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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