Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
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