Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize
