Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Randomize