Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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