garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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