yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize