yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Randomize
